Okay, this will be a challenge. Fairies aren’t known for being cooperative. I may have to get creative to keep their attention.
Fairies are very vain creatures, so the best way to keep on its good side is to pay it lots of compliments and attention.
Hello there. You’re looking fabulous today.
Buzz.
No, really. I love what you’ve done with your hair. Is it okay if I talk to this quill about you, tell it how awesome you are?
Buzz, buzz!
Great! Thank you.
Okay, so this particular fairy is very special. She helped find a lot of her friends and rescue them before Proffessor Snape could take their wings for his potion class.
Buzz!
I know! What a horrible man. Who would want to take fairy wings. I mean, they are gorgeous.
Buzz buzz.
But yeah, fairy wings are a big ingredient in a lot of potions. Fortunately there are many humane ways to get them without hurting their owners.
Buzz, buzz buzz.
Huh? Oh, yeah, you can sit on my hand.
Now, Fairies are easy to offend. Like I said, they are very vain. But if are able to keep on its good side, they can be very helpful and…
Buzz buzz!
Oh, you have something to say?
Buzz…
Oh, you want me to…really? Erm…okay. Like this?
Buzz!
Huh. Sorry. I should probably mention one of the ways you can get on it’s good side is help it masturbate. It a lot of ways their genitalia functions the same as a woman’s. They have an opening between their legs from which they make their eggs. In some ways it functions like any other pussy. And when they are in mating season…
Oh, shit! I forgot that’s today. No wonder you’re all over my fingers.
Buzz, buzz buzz!
Okay, yeah. Hang on…here you go, just very carefully…it that okay?
Buzz!!
Alright, just lie back and relax.
Buzz…buzz…buzz…
Where was I?
So, sometimes during mating season they like to masturbate if they’re not in the mood to…well, make babies. Sometimes I come in here and let them ride my fingers, just like this one here.
Buzz…
You have to be really careful if they trust you enough to do this with them. If you push too much of your finger in…we’ll, I can see my fingertip bulging in her belly right there. She really loves it though.
I should…probably just cut all that out of the paper.
Buzz buzz!
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